There is no point to happy fantasies if we cannot face the sad reality.
Today marks the 10th death anniversary of my eldest brother. I still can’t believe that it’s been a decade since he passed away. But, no matter how much time has passed, I can still remember practically everything from how the news was told to me, to the day we buried my brother.
It was exactly just a month after my 13th birthday. I was still living in Jeddah at the time and my brother had left for Philippines the previous week. I remember how at the middle of the day at class, I was called over by my section adviser to get my things because I was leaving early. It was around noon or a little past noon. Then I saw my dad with my youngest brother, we left for the car and headed straight home. He didn’t tell us why we were going home so early and I didn’t bother to ask at the time.
When we got home, my mom was sitting at the dining table. She told me and my brother to eat, and so we did. It was after eating that they told us the news and that we were going back to the Philippines that very night. I don’t remember much about that day. All I remember is that I did everything I could to hold back my tears. I slept through the nearly everything from the plane to Philippines and the car ride from the airport to the house.
Then, I saw my brother inside the casket. Immediately I went to my parents room where my other siblings were waiting. And I just poured my soul out. I couldn’t believe that someone so close to me had passed away. I couldn’t believe that I just saw him joking around with me and my family no more than two weeks ago. I couldn’t believe that we would forever be, incomplete as a family.
It felt like the world around me had stopped at that time. Everyone had their own way of coping with the situation. And my way, let’s just say I kept things to myself. I couldn’t even look directly inside the casket, because I was afraid that the image of seeing someone I hold dear to me was inside a casket, just waiting to be buried, that that image would haunt me for the rest of my life.
Even till now, I rarely open up about the painful things that I keep locked away somewhere inside me. I do this regularly just because I don’t want to burden the people around me. That my problems would seem insignificant or rather, small compared to theirs.
Maybe, that’s why I’m so open to listening to people and their problems. Because I don’t want them to feel the same way I did back then. All held up and afraid to let people know how I really felt. I just hid behind the superficial image and went with the flow.
I’m 23 now, and I know that there are more challenges ahead of me and others. But, sometimes I wonder how different our lives would be if he had not passed away when he did. We’ll never know those things. All I do know is that I miss him and my family.
It isn’t easy, to lose someone, emotionally or physically. And I don’t think there will come a time where it will be easy. And now, all that I have to say is, enjoy the time you have, especially with the people you hold dear to you. No matter who they are and where they are. We will never know when we will lose those dear to us, that said, find time to spend it with them.
People don’t often change too much.
Change is inevitable, but it doesn’t come overnight nor is it usually noticable.
A funny idea popped into my head two days ago during the first day of Otaku Expo Reload 2012.
A friend of my just got out of a relationship gone bad and had this bitter lines, usually his jokes are lame and goes unnoticed. But this line was epic, a little wording, a picture and a shirt and it became a hit.
Don’t believe me? Check it out for yourselves 😉
For Facebook Users, original picture is linked below. Feel free to like or share.
For Google+ Users, a re-uploaded shot is here.
Keep it cool guys and remember,
Love is Not a Game!
Pissed off mood night before my outing with my college mates. It was supposed to be a good night for me but thanks to one of my immature cousins I have this crappy mood just before going to a outing I was really excited about.
I was about to give one of my girl cousins a run for her money because of her bad attitude. Being the oldest child in a family means you have to grow up sooner than expected, but with this cousin it’s the complete opposite. A total lack of respect towards her elders by not listening to what they say.
Being immature at your early 20s is something serious especially if you want to make something of your life. I really wonder how someone can be so carefree when they already are working. Why drink all the time when you can’t even hold your own after a bottle or two. It’s like having a brain and not making good use of it. I’d get it if you were still at the start of your college years but you’re already working. Grow up please.
I was seriously about to deliver a bitch slap to a 20+ year old working girl cousin for being immature in front of our several of our younger cousins as well as for wasting time and gas just because she didn’t want to say where the fucked up bar was.
I mean who has the nerve to do that? Knowing that it was past 1:30 in the morning and one of our cousins had an appointment later that morning. I mean, fuck you? Do you know how much gas costs these days in the Philippines? And to top it all off you’re free loading most of the time. At least have the decency to respect the people that are helping you and not be a total selfish bitch.
HotSeat and BlazbluePhilippines Present!
CROSS THE LINE!
Do you play BlazBlue? Maybe Street Fighter? Ok how about Tekken? Well do you enjoy playing fighting games? Do you enjoy playing games? Would like want to play with people outside of your circle? Would yo enjoy just simply watching games?
Whatever your answer is, be it a yes or a no, I strongly suggest you mark yourself free at the 24th of March and drop by iPlay (location below) and join us as we play BlazBlue Continuum Shift: Extend and Street Fighter X Tekken!
Sherwoods Place Compound Taft Ave. in front of the big white DLSU bldg (Andrew), in between VitoCruz and Quirino LRT stations. – (Google Map)
Events, Details and Fees:
Registration Time: 11am
Tournament Time: 1pm
House Fee: 50PHP
Streetfighter X Tekken 1v1 Tournament
Default No. Round and Time
Win 2/3 (even in grand finals, winner’s bracket twice to beat)
Default chars of PS3
Change char only after
Tourney Fee: 100 per head
Blazblue: Extend 2v2 Tournament
Register on the spot or form your team before hand
grand finals – winner’s bracket twice to beat
Register your mains, losing team may change chars after losing a set
During a match player order is decided by jack-n-poy or toss coin etc
Tourney Fee: 70 per head
What Is Waseda Style?
Example Team AB vs Team XY
A vs X
B Vs Y
if both AB or XY win, they move forward to next round but if A wins and B loses or vice-versa a deciding match will occur.
A vs Y
B vs X